Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize