I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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