Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
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I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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