no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
