i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
