told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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