where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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