Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
NoShamevember. You game?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Randomize
