I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
