glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
