it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize