I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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