Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just gift wrapped bread.
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And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
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