brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize