You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
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Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
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woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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