A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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