As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize