I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
No more Irish car bombs ever.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
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