i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
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