Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize