SEEEEXXX PLEASE
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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