My balls are so social today.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize