i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
