I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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