if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
