i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize
