i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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