she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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