Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video

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  (914): Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video http://tfl.nu/m72m
  Replies (43) Good night (11306) Bad night (901)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.

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  (910): Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up. http://tfl.nu/oxuw
  Replies (26) Good night (8130) Bad night (1313)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe

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  (903): Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe http://tfl.nu/shgh
  Replies (8) Good night (3922) Bad night (932)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn

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  (419): its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn http://tfl.nu/wwy8
  Replies (3) Good night (1034) Bad night (2941)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???

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  (717): Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK??? http://tfl.nu/2k2z
  Replies (13) Good night (3617) Bad night (1326)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.

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  (304): Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day. http://tfl.nu/phv5
  Replies (4) Good night (2489) Bad night (1202)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?

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  (313): Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today? http://tfl.nu/iyco
  Replies (3) Good night (1814) Bad night (840)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?

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  (248): Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door? http://tfl.nu/ayiv
  Replies (4) Good night (980) Bad night (1659)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  What can I say, I'm a giver.

  (1-608): View more from Wisconsin

  Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.

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  (608): What can I say, I'm a giver. (1-608): Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian. http://tfl.nu/c94l
  Replies (11) Good night (1986) Bad night (618)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...

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  (+44): The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off... http://tfl.nu/dj4h
  Replies (2) Good night (1311) Bad night (439)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.

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  (303): Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement. http://tfl.nu/mbmy
  Replies (2) Good night (1378) Bad night (460)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.

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  (714): She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View. http://tfl.nu/be63
  Replies (12) Good night (964) Bad night (2622)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...

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  (646): I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes... http://tfl.nu/1uwm
  Replies (9) Good night (375) Bad night (1295)
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  (559): View more from California

  I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right

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  (559): I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right http://tfl.nu/jxe2
  Replies (2) Good night (379) Bad night (234)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!

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  (479): Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating! http://tfl.nu/g8qn
  Replies (0) Good night (366) Bad night (227)

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