Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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