I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.