wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
