Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
