I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Do you have feelings for this penis?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.