In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
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I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
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Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter