I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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