The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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