Texts From Last Night

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  (281): View more from Texas

  so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?

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  (281): so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad? http://tfl.nu/ttkx
  Replies (18) Good night (1267) Bad night (5030)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?

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  (973): who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture? http://tfl.nu/e2ho
  Replies (38) Good night (1242) Bad night (3520)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own

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  (519): i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own http://tfl.nu/ot8v
  Replies (27) Good night (8624) Bad night (1135)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.

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  (541): woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue. http://tfl.nu/skao
  Replies (13) Good night (4726) Bad night (3448)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.

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  (701): I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot. http://tfl.nu/vxu1
  Replies (9) Good night (4282) Bad night (920)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.

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  (678): Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation. http://tfl.nu/0izo
  Replies (5) Good night (996) Bad night (1925)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.

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  (828): Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me. http://tfl.nu/wdvy
  Replies (15) Good night (8128) Bad night (1070)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  we already have meals planned for the weekend.

  (1-864): View more from South Carolina

  SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.

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  (864): we already have meals planned for the weekend. (1-864): SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL. http://tfl.nu/xo3s
  Replies (13) Good night (5041) Bad night (1032)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.

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  (713): Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America. http://tfl.nu/d35e
  Replies (12) Good night (1738) Bad night (616)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?

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  (810): Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation? http://tfl.nu/9j5z
  Replies (7) Good night (1103) Bad night (724)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay

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  (920): if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay http://tfl.nu/6sqm
  Replies (3) Good night (897) Bad night (430)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  Fuck him.

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  (304): When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred. (606): Fuck him. http://tfl.nu/h9q7
  Replies (2) Good night (1376) Bad night (854)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla

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  (615): Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla http://tfl.nu/8j5u
  Replies (3) Good night (336) Bad night (681)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary

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  (214): I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary http://tfl.nu/wcin
  Replies (9) Good night (295) Bad night (723)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown

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  (330): And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown http://tfl.nu/9oqz
  Replies (0) Good night (430) Bad night (296)

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