u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
