So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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