You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
A bitchslap is in order.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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