What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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