She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
