can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize