you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great