Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days