cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"