every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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