Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
