does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
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