I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize