Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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