I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize