if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
