i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize