So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
